What type of Captain are you?

Often in the course of life it all boils downs to what kind of leader you are. Well, some of you will ask why does one need to be a leader to be able to handle life’s vagaries. True enough… but is n’t that the practical fact... That when it all boils down to taking control of your life and making the best of it, you are your own leader…

My lessons in leadership actually began way back when I was a kid playing gully cricket... to the uninitiated, it means the cricket for the urbanites where high rises ensues that no credible patch of green is left for anyone to play…

We would play on the road of the gully which used to be a narrow lane with a dead end which ensured that we did not have much of a thoroughfare traffic and play continued mostly uninterrupted..

Though it was a beautiful setting for a typical gully cricket, what made it sometimes frustrating was a swamp which was on one side and a building on the other side whose owner proved to be more challenging than the swamp itself in retrieving the ball…

To ensure that the wannabe cricketers of morrow do not get adventurous and make the ball disappear (which by the way came from collective funding from all players), hitting on that side of the “ground” was taboo…

Now coming back to the game (and also where the ball went missing), it threw up quite interesting leadership types which was amazing and eye opening. Here goes the list: 

1.       “No-pain No – Gain” Captain:

If you happen to have a captain belonging to this criteria, then forget about corporate managers who are famous for screwing your happiness. This guy alone could make you regret the hit to the “forbidden land” for the rest of your life. Not only he will ensure that you go out and search for the ball but in the case of non – retrieval would ensure that you cough up the money or else given a life ban of the game (and believe me “life ban” used to be serious business in our kind of game from which it was quite difficult to “absolve” yourself)

I have seen this type of captain go on to become, and you have guessed it correctly, corporate managers screwing the happiness of all and sundry. 

2.       Risk diversification captain:

This type of captain had a sense of equanimity and equality which could parallel non others. They believed in the game being a team event for which each and every member of the team was equally responsible. Hence they also implemented the philosophy by asking each one to pay up equal amount to purchase a new ball.

I have found such player go on to achieve the highest of professional laurels and goals in life. 

3.       Blame shifting captain:

This category of captain would wait for the slightest hint of things (and in this case the ball) going amiss and then pounce upon the next unsuspecting victim in shifting the blame entirely. They were career cribbers who would go in to extensive length of how one’s action could have led to thing being in the mess that it is right now. If their view were not taken then they surely were to leave the game in a huff.

These people have gone on to achieve not a great deal in life while also putting their family life in a mess. 

4.       The “Deserter” Captain:

While the above category metamorphoses to this category quite late in the turn of events, this category of captains, it seemed, were made to justify the proverb that “when the ship sinks the rats are the first to evacuate” or one of its colloquial equivalent… the perpetual expression on their face would be you-mess-with-me-and-I- am- gonna-go-home…

These type of people have gotten in and out of low paid jobs while at the same time not admitting that the fault if any could be at their end not anyone else’s. 

5.       The “emotional” captain:

This type of captain would agree to keep the cricketing kit at his home, carry them to and fro the playground and also keep the wicket ready for the game to begin. For him it always seem as if he is organising his own domestic function… running around and doing things which was beyond the call of duty… such captains have typically large heart but get hurt at the smallest of things… in case if a ball goes missing, and he is pressurised by the blame shifting and/or the deserter captain, he not only agrees to pay for the full amount but also throws in some homemade sweet at the end of the game just to keep everybody in good humour…

Such type of people have gone on to be achievers in their realm... because of their passion and commitment they have achieved greatness in life but however are unable to retain it as they get miffed and offended at the slightest of provocation/offence

  

6.       “On the sly” captain/player:

This type of people would never Donne the mantle of captainship but would wait for the right opportunity to make gains. So when a ball would go missing, they would notice where it went but would make it appear as if they are clueless and mislead others who may be looking for it. Once the game is over and everybody goes home, such creatures return with a torchlight and retrieve the ball to be used for in house play. The next day they will be the one who will be seen missing from the cricketing scene.

Such people have not done a whole good to their life - always on the lookout and waiting for the jackpot moment when they can make a fast buck which never comes about.

The Storm Within

The restlessness in me makes me to look out and assign  a reason,
is it my belongingness that is a cause?
or the fact that life may get stagnant causing the worry?
or is it the constant challenge in me getting the better of me?

In the quest for a reason, I set out to a far off land,
hoping to find solace there only to be disillusioned later...but alas!



The restlessness in me gets the better of me...
Goading me to go on and find yet something divine,  something perfect something surreal...


The storm within is yet to be analysed...
to be seen in slow motion to understand and be understood...
To comprehend the dynamics and dynamism of it...
Till then I will remain an unexplained mystery,
who could have been The One but alas!

In this journey I hear "well wishers" wishing that I would slow down, settle down a bit,
Let the restlessness find a "resting place"...
"Life is not like a railway station that you can get down at each station", they tell me...
How can I show them the storm within me is looking for something novel, something fresh, something extraordinary...
A challenge which has not yet been challenged...
A challenge which will cause it to slow down and find peace within...

Till such a time egos will be bruised, vanity will be trampled upon and scant regard paid to the slow runners...
For within me is a force which has not learnt to wait, watch and be reclusive...

Memory from a hazy morning

The rain pittered pattered the whole night long on the asbestos roof above

While the family slept safely oblivious to the force of nature outside,

The backyard pond swelled up like a fertile woman

Whose womb has been sown with the seed of a resurgent tomorrow,

Frogs croak merrily sitting on the leaves of lilies waiting for the heaven to open up and pour herself down yet once more

With the hazy light of the morning the children slowly wake up to the story of nature’s ravage of yester night

Slowly they come out of the house with eager faces to see the aftermath

But what an aftermath that meets their eye!

The ‘ravages’ of nature has created such a scenic beauty outside

With the dry hot parched earth having quenched its thirst…

With the sweet smell of moist earth titillating the nostrils…

With the fresh and cool breeze caressing the skin softly…

With the myriad voices of nature adding a beautiful symphony to the riots of scenic beauty…

With horizon dark and not so menacing promising of more grace from heaven..

Comes the reassuring voice of mother from inside the house…

“It seems it’s going to rain the whole day… you kids need to stay back at home from school today…

Pure bliss and ecstasy…

The quirky fate

Just after 1 day of drafting this post, I came across the address of Michael Lewis at Princeton on the vital role that luck plays to what happens to be the most important aspect of our life - success. As luck would have it, here I had keyed in a post on luck but albeit on a different aspect of life - love, loss and conquest.

Have you ever believed in divine intervention? The thing that people term as the invisible hand or the doing of the gods? The advocates of rationality will argue that there is no such thing... Everything has a cause and an effect.. While the believers will say that indeed it is the only way which ensures things are in perpetuity and continuity... How else do you explain infants/children surviving aircraft crash or natural disasters... A passenger missing his chance to board a train which meets with a terrible accident later or even KKR winning the final ;) 

Jokes apart, this is a topic which has intrigued me in more ways than one... What is that X-factor which ensures fortune swings your way when there is every likelihood of it turning the other way...Such incidence takes me far away to an era where I was still a student (believe me, there was such an era too! ;)

It was during the days when I was doing my medicine and had recently got transferred from a lesser known college to the best college of the state (which was again closer to home)... This was like a dream come true and I was more than happy to join the graduating class of 2004 in the 1st year (1st year was an ambiguous term for what happened to be an actual duration of 1 and a half years in the curriculum)... I still remember the Month of April, 1999 when I joined the class...

The class consisted of students equally represented across gender (and that means male and female only!)... A bright lot, it was an inspiring experience to be one among the best with them... The class was divided in to pairs (not study pairs!) of boy and girl at various points in the friend-buddy-soul buddy-lover continuum...However, what was intriguing was just this one girl...

This girl, for the sake on unanimity, lets call her Mamta, was different from the rest... Though dusky in colour (God! how much our country places a premium on fair colour;)), Mamta had a glow of radiance and aura about her which was mystic, distant and yet had an alluring charm to it... Being a new comer I was also taken in by her charm (as I had just come from a college which had a very poor repertoire of such beauty to boast of) but for the records resisted it to pursue mundane activities like academic excellence...

The thing with boys and for that matter men is that unlike the fairer sex (who are just busy praising each other in a till-death-do-us-part way or cat fighting among theme selves) they just have only one topic to discuss about- and you are wrong... Its anatomy.. for that was the dreaded subject in 1st year and of course girls.. ah... now I see... You got the drift... Any ways, as luck would have it, I struck an instantaneous friendship with the boy gang and was welcomed with open arms.. Instantly all of us fell in to the hot topics which included the one discussed here too...

In the course of the discussion, I came to know that although most of the chaps were paired/stuck with one girl or the other, Mamta was one who had kept herself away from such bonding.. In fact, soon enough I found out that most of the guys were totally smitten by her and were at various points in the lover-crazy lover-maniac lover-psychopath continuum... No I am dead serious here... It was famously narrated that one chap was so enamored by her that he shut himself close in the room for close to a week when the final rejection came... There was another, who though spurned, would regularly cut cake and gave out chocolates to all and sundry in the hostel on the day of her birthday... There was another one, who threw himself down... now, now, hold it... he threw himself down from the bed when the final word of denial came...

Such was the might and influence of Mamta that let alone our batch, even our seniors were bewitched by her... I still remember a very married senior pursuing his post grads would come in the scorching heat of the afternoon on some pre text or the other so that he could give her a lift from the ladies hostel to the nearest kirnana shop which was not more than 200 m away... I have seen seniors (both grads and post grads) fight like nitwits among themselves just to be near her...

With such a long queue of her fan and her ephemeral charm, Mamata literally could have anybody she wanted but kept herself away from such activities... Such abstinence and abstaining mutli folded her love for the multitude of her lovers who would be happy for months if not years if she as much as glance at them and/or smiled (even though it was meant for a fellow batch mate or other friends from the ladies hostel who may be behind)... Though many of them knew about this reality few acknowledged it and feigned/pretended as if it was meant for them...

Now to cut a long story short, Mamta remained 'single' and was not ready to 'mingle'...

Then entered the real hero....He was a 5 ft 2 in bald, pot bellied caricature of a human being who spoke in a shrill womanly voice... He was supposedly the topper of the P.G entrance that year... Having come from a private college, rumours were rife that he has done some serious under the table dealing for the seat as well as the position... Be that as it may, our hero was an ambitious and colourful person and was such a powerful package who to be seen to be believed... As he entered the campus and the hostel, he declared gleefully that he will charm and befriend the most 'happening babe' in the college... Pathetic as it may sound, we had no option but to nod our head in agreement as being juniors we were the gullible audience :(

Our hero proved himself to be quite the worthless rogue that he was in academics within the first fortnight... However, what he proved himself to be worthy was his earlier promise which he had made... He was quick to identify the most "happening babe' who happened to be the jewel of our batch... Then with the utmost of sincerity he launched himself in to the "Mission Impossible" of wooing her... Firstly as any unsuspecting wooer, he approached her directly only to be rejected in the most strongest of words possible... We have seen many guys getting rejected at the hands of Mamta, but never before has a rejection been this strong... We thought our hero had it... that either he will reform and concentrate more on studies or pack his bags and be off... As competition waited patiently to see his back, our hero had designs of his own...

Withe a strange stubbornness which one can but associate with fools, he pursued her relentlessly wherever she went only to be chided in the harshest word possible... Words which will put the fear of the almighty in you... But our hero was made up of sterner stuff... He tried formula no. 444... The friends route...

One must appreciate the kind of groundwork he did here.. He not only found out her friends, but also who were "the best friends" to her... A complete stoppage of all activity (during the groundwork)was cheering up the competition brigade to the level of ecstatic joy totally unaware of the final assault that the wily general was planning... Having identified 2 of her best friends, the hero focused all his attention on both of them... so come breakfast, they will find him waiting with delicacy "from home" each day which every time somoehow coincided with products from in the next door sweet shop... He was also careful in understanding their likes and dislikes and showered gifts on them and the occasion would pop up like club soda - his b'day, his sis b'day' relatives 'b'day etc etc... However both the friends (hailing from a certain business section known for their 'austerity') were more than happy to accept it without finding out the reason behind it... So come new academic year, they will find new books (hardbound medical books especially purchased from Calcutta costing minimum of 2000 bucks apiece), stethoscope, Blood pressure machine, diagnostic tool (knee hammer, ENT sets etc) finding its way to their study table literally as surprise gifts... The man was like a consummate Santa Claus giving away free gifts... The only difference was that the benefactor for this Santa Claus was just limited to 2 only... 

What such investment meant was that such 'benevolence' created a 'tinge' of sympathy in the heart of the so called sisters (now he has made them his sisters) for their "cutey lovable" brother... In retrospect, the world could have gained a lot had they taken advise of this astute investor in preventing the economic slowdown witnessed after dumb jackass people calling them selves investment bakers brought the financial world to a grinding halt...

Each day the sisters would carry tales of heartbreak, sobs and tears (running nose and phlegm not withstanding) to Mamta who will look at them with an expression "even- if- he- is- that- last- person- with-whom- I- would- have- to fall- in- love, I- would -never- do- it". Though I do not have professional training in human psychology, but I could tell you this with some amount of confidence that here ladies and gentleman, was a fine game of peer pressure coupled with an image of victim hood and associated sympathy played to perfection....

Now you must be eager to know what are the outcomes... Well ladies and gentleman, we regret to inform you that the inevitable happened... The epitome of grace, patience and steadfastness finally succumbed to the pressure and took the bait.... 

So one fine day, lo and behold! many young lovers heart were shattered beyond recognition, as they saw their lady of fantasy going past them slowly on an age old TVS Avanti (for those who are unaware, TVS Avanti has been discarded after independence and has been declared a national treasure to be preserved in the museum for its 'impeccable speed and pick up") with our hero...

 What followed was a passionate love affair quickly culminating in what most young rebel from my era did... A court marriage... So while the affair continued, behind closed doors and suppressed whispers, news were exchanged of how the marriage has indeed happened and how so and so has seen the marriage certificates etc...

 At the end we can just conclude by saying that fate does strange thing to people and even now when poeple say that so and so and such and such thing may never be possible, I prefer to take it with a pinch of salt...

Circa 2012: 

The epilogue to the story is as follows:

Mamta's family could never accept her and she and the hero settled down in the city to what was a life full of hardship. Though I have never seen Mamta after our college days, from what I have heard she's become a pale ghost of what she was in the past... With hubby dear being chucked out of P.G after umpteenth failure to clear the 1st year, she is the sole bread winner of the family which now has a little daughter as the new member... Fortunately for Mamta, she just got a P.G and is continuing her education...